I've Been Dreaming

I can't recall a time where things around the house have been this empty and quiet.

Sis called and we spoke for a while. I got to know some disturbing news, developments that I never knew existed right until now. I knew mum and dad were not quite on good terms but I never really thought much about it. I mean a family crisis is a family crisis, and no matter what somehow we'd always overcome it and things would go back to the way they were. For one who's seen a lot of wars and peace in the family, I won't deny that I have and am taking things for granted, that nothing worse that petty fights could ever break us up. I hate to think about it but the possibility is real and I can't imagine it happening. I can't accept any part of it.

I've never seen mum like this and Im worried for her. The bigger worry is, I don't know how to help her or dad too for that matter... Somehow providing a listening ear just doesn't seem to be enough.

God, let there be love cos it seems to be fading fast within mum, within dad.



I know having a relationship or trying to start one is always difficult. But to actually go through it at firsthand is mind boggling and I do mean mind boggling! In all honesty, I've never been on a real meaningful relationship. As compared to those typical young and rushed monkey love, to one that feels adult. And catching the prize of cos has never been my speciality. I've either been to shy to let my feelings known therefore letting the girl be taken by other unworthy scums or I just didn't care enough to try harder and be smarter in the game. Dumbass weirdo. I lack credibility but knowing me, I know the potential to do well is there in me.

Apart from the rare spats (not Single.Parents.Alone.Together!), I think we're doing fine. And Im just glad I have her at this point of time. Me beside you beside me.

It's a bittersweet feeling. Here you are being at one of the happiest times of your life and on the other hand, potentially one of your saddest all at the same time...